It’s been three months since I started dear dawcy! What I’m learning hasn’t been so much about crunching numbers and getting my SEO on fleek, it is a little but it really isn’t the bigger lesson. I am learning to relax and to enjoy the process, it gets done when it gets done.
I am learning to let the pressure go. Not that it doesn’t rise up and over take me sometimes but I’m doing mental push ups for my brain to push it back and tell it to calm the fuck down and wait it’s turn. I wanted to do this this time around without the fifty hats on my head, and to not fall into that rushed feeling day in day out, that panic when you are in the rat race, running your laps. The love of the craft gives out quickly and you are running yourself into the gorund for reasons you can’t see anymore. I wanted to focus myself and my new business and have my main intention be LOVE. The love of making what I love. The love of creation. I am using creation as a meditation and I feel it really works to calm my mind when I get into the flow state and I can be there, let it flow. I practise not rushing it, just being there in it. Suspended. A circular type flow. Task by task, minute by minute. Relax into it, just be there in the present moment making what I am making, doing what I’m doing. Being there. Things I say to myself; Stay in this moment and honestly often “relax your face”. It’s hard for me to do.
It seems simple for a lot of people and for most brains it is an automatic function but for me it is not. I have to consciously remember and practise being there. I have to pull myself back to reality like a balloon floating away, yank it down and back to earth regularly. I get lost. Like I exist on another plane of existence running parallel to the real world. I am in and out, passing over the the transit of time, in and out, back for a bit and then I’m out. I’m gone. Full hours can pass, I will come to in another place having driven myself there. I recount events that just happened an hour ago, with gaps in it. What was I doing? What did I do? What did I say? Who was there? I have to think hard to recount it. Because I wasn’t really there. So practising this being in the moment stuff really is like push ups for my brain. I enter that state and escape into it yes but I am consciously being there for each snip, each link, each weld, each squeeze with the pliers, each piece of metal flying, each whiff of essentail oil, each measurement, each moment, I am in that flow state, and I can’t advocate more for the creative process in maintaining your mental health and staying in the wellness side of the spectrum.
I’m re-learning to channal my mind in a productive creative way with something that keeps me excited every day. Every public event; feed back and new faces encouraging me by liking the things I make, instant gratification! I don’t have to wait for supervisors or statistics to come back to tell me I have done a good job. What I am doing now is the right path beacause even when I have had a bad day, I feel better seeing my customer’s smiling faces, kind comments and when I sit at my table to work and enter that flow state. I have been taking walks midday too which makes me all the more productive, a good ol shot of nature and I am loving it. Productivity really does increase, more than if I forced myself to work work work. It comes back ten fold after a good jaunt in the woods. I get right back into that flow state and go. I named ciruclar pieces of jewelry after it, the ” Flow State earrings” and the “Flow state” necklace . The circle. I found it again. In more ways than one, the circle of the creative flow state, the circle of customers who are my people, and the vendors and organizers at the events who get that creative powerful energy going round and round and round the room!